The Beginning of a Journey

The true beginning occurred when I consciously decided that I was meant to be something else, not a teacher.  I have to say I did not mind the students.  They were fun and interesting people.  I didn't mind my coworkers or the administration.  I did not mind getting up at quarter to six every morning to go to work.  I enjoyed being on a work schedule and making money.  But I just didn't love the core of what I was doing everyday, teaching English.  And it's not fair to the students and it was not fair to myself to be in a job that I didn't passionately love.  So I decided to quit at the end of the year.  About a month before the end of the year I was laid-off.

It's hard to lose your job even when you don't like it, even when you were planning on quitting anyway.  I felt lost for a while.  I gave myself time to just be, to think, to reflect, to enjoy life again, to reconnect with people I hadn't had time for, to reconnect with myself and my inner child, to spend more time with family.  For a while I couldn't even stand the idea of going back to work, any job, not even a library.  I just needed time to heal.  I understand not everyone has a choice, but doing something you don't like for years takes a toll on you and should be avoided like Superman avoids kryptonite.

Finally I became stronger again and the vision of what I wanted became sharp.  It was time to become a librarian.  And that's where I'm at now.  At the beginning of a journey.  I have asked for recommendations from people I admire and am in the process of applying to Library School.  Current mission:  Write a Personal Statement.

Shouldn't be a problem with my faithful sidekicks BookEnd and BookMark:

BookEnd

BookMark

The Developement of a SuperHeroine

All superheros start somewhere.  I don't remember exactly when it started for me, but what I do know is that a couple of years ago I became obsessed with becoming a librarian.  But instead I became a high school English teacher.  I was on track to be a teacher, I was expected to be a teacher, and I didn't ever come to the conclusion that I didn't have to be one.  Even as I was interviewing for teaching jobs I constantly spoke of being a librarian.  But I got a teaching job and so I became a teacher.  I give teachers that stick around a lot of credit even the average ones.  Teaching may be one of the most stressful and demanding but unrewarding job.  Teachers put in hours on the clock and when they get home from work generally keep putting hours on the clock until they go to bed.  Their work is never finished.  Their weekends are consumed with lesson planning and grading.  Two months of summer was not even worth all the work that was put in during the school year.  So for me, who truly wasn't meant to be a teacher, you can imagine how tough teaching was on me.  As a young twenty-something I was noticing fine lines under my eyes and gray hair!

One night I was watching Twilight with my husband.  It seems like in the Twilight world some humans have gifts, such as seeing visions of the future.  When these humans with gifts become vampires their gifts enhance, for example always seeing the future and seeing it clearly.  This got me to wondering what my gift or power might be.  And for a while I was truly stumped.  What am I unusually good at?  What am I good at at all?  After much thought I realized that I enjoy and am able to find information really well.  But that isn't a power, is it?  I mean come on, there's Google!  It was at least a skill I could claim.

Once I recognized I had a skill I was more aware of the people around me that didn't.  Many older adults were unable to find information as quickly as I was.  Okay, so maybe that was because of their discomfort with technology.  People my own age were unable to find information as quickly as me.  I often found myself telling people how to more quickly find things on the internet using different search words.  This seemed so simple to me.  Often I would just take over the computer and find the information for them myself.  So maybe some people in my generation just aren't as computer savvy.  The last straw was when my students - sixteen and seventeen year olds - the generation of ipod users, texters, kids born using the Internet! could not find information using the internet, let alone books!  Doing a research paper was hard for them, and I'm talking about just collecting the information which should have been easy in an age where everything is super accessible.  And I thought, "Oh my God, I can find things, quickly and efficiently.  I can find anything in a short amount of time and if I can't find it most likely no one can."  I can find information.  Not everyone has the ability or can as easily find information as I can.  I am FindItGirl!